Scars
by dinkyfairybaby
Summary: HPDM after the event. post war, one shot, M rated for language only. possibly a T, but im not sure how we define 'minor langauge' these days lol. R&R please


**A.N. **This is a song fic, the song is 'Scars by Papa Roach' It's a Harry Draco the rating is for the language only. This is my first male pairing and its only short, it's a one shot, as are all my song fics, hope you like please review.

**Disclaimer: **Harry Potter is not mine, nor is the song 'scars' I am using them for my own emotional release and pleasure like the selfish bitch I am lol.

**Scars**

Looking down at his arms he traced those beautiful silver slivers only just glimmering in the flickering candle light. His arms were creamy colored anyway, and those thin snakes working their way up and around his arms were only a tiny shade different. But different they were; scar tissue. The only way to remember it all; Bruises fade, Cuts heal, Scars last forever.

I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut  
My weakness is that I care too much  
And my scars remind me that the past is real  
I tear my heart open just to feel

Looking around at his bedroom he let out a little laugh, hearing it would have made anyone cringe, it was bitter, twisted and broken. But that's what he was wasn't it? He looked at the sheets beneath him; silk. He slid off the bed and to the floor, when had he turned in to this? Picking up the bottle next to his fine chest of draws he lent his head back to the mattress and closed his eyes. He couldn't keep doing this over and over.

Drunk and I'm feeling down  
And I just wanna be alone  
I'm pissed cause you came around  
Why don't you just go home

Screaming that line at _him_ always made him cringe, he never overstayed his welcome did he? 'Stupid bastard' Harry thought taking a swig of the liquor in his hand and leaning back again to the comfort of the soft mattress on his head, knowing that the burning in his back from sitting like this would only get worse if he stayed here much longer.

Cause you channel all your pain  
And I can't help you fix yourself  
You're making me insane  
All I can say is

I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut  
My weakness is that I care too much  
And our scars remind us that the past is real  
I tear my heart open just to feel 

He'd tried, anyone, everyone could see that but no more, the bastard had treated him like fucking shite and this time was the last time. He'd once said to his best friend 'every time he calls my name he knows I'm going back to him' but no longer he had to get on with is own life.

I tried to help you once  
Against my own advice

He snorted in to the bottle at this time, against his own and everyone else who knew him and everyone knew him didn't they? Being famous sucked ass in Harry's opinion, and the fact that his now ex boyfriend was famous too just made it all the worse, but his ex loved the fame… lived for it, couldn't live without it Harry sometimes thought. Didn't stop him being a cheating controlling arsehole he must have known he'd get caught? He was such a joke…

I saw you going down  
But you never realized  
That you're drowning in the water  
So I offered you my hand  
Compassions in my nature  
Tonight is our last stand 

Those were his exact words that night it all ended, 'tonight's our last stand, stand next to me and ill see you threw' Everyone had fought him on his decision to love this man, told him it wasn't right, that he would end up being hurt and he'd told them they were wrong. He'd looked at his best friend and told him he was wrong, that love could over come it all and that he loved that man, if his best friend loved him then he would stand by him. And he had. Hanging his head Harry let a tear slip down his cheek, he'd promised himself last time that he wouldn't cry another tear for that man; another promise broken, another heart ripped open… here we go again eh? He quirked a horrible smile, lips twisted looking as though it was almost painful to do so.

I'm drunk and I'm feeling down  
And I just wanna be alone  
You shouldn't ever come around  
Why don't you just go home?  
Cause you're drowning in the water  
And I tried to grab your hand  
And I left my heart open  
But you didn't understand  
But you didn't understand  
Go fix yourself

He had tried, honestly but today he finally came to the conclusion that no one could fix anyone else, they could try, flog their guts out doing so, but no, no one could fix someone else. You had to do it yourself, that's what he had done after the war, he and Ron had mourned the death of their best friend, she had been beautiful, both inside and out and Harry missed her everyday, but he had put himself back together. He had lost so many people, all of them loved deeply, but he had gotten back up hadn't he? It's not like he hadn't tried to help and support was it.

I can't help you fix yourself  
But at least I can say I tried  
I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life 

He drank the last of the bottle and lifted his head up.

I can't help you fix yourself  
But at least I can say I tried  
I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life

That was it, his song had reached number one on the WWN, that smile, that truly heartbreaking smile appeared on his face… well now the world could know couldn't they, that was the way it went… he didn't see the point in not releasing the song he wrote for Draco, its not like the world didn't know what went on between them. He got up, walking somewhat groggily and put the bottle in the bin, grimacing some what when he heard it smash, ah well he could clean it up tomorrow when he cleaned up the rest of this place, looking around the room he saw all that 'Malfoy' influence, it was all going, he was moving on. He'd wasted four years on that man, and he couldn't do it anymore. He was 25 tomorrow, he'd fought Voldemort at 19, he'd re-built his life at 20 and he'd fallen in love at 21. He could start over at 25; there was nothing to hold him back anymore.

He walked down the soft carpet of the stairs, forgetting as usual that the cold marble of the entrance hall would reach his toes before he got to the rug in the centre. He walked to the door, slipping on his boots and his evening cloak, he was going to Ron's, he had some making up to do. He walked out the front door of the manor and to his car, telling his driver where he wanted to go, down to the gates he went, past the usual annoying camera men that lived outside his gate, normally trying to get pictures of him and his beloved, now trying to get pictures of him alone to stick on tomorrows papers, along with a headline like 'Harry Potter a man scorned for the last time' or something equally as depressing. He rolled down the window at the gate and flipped them off, knowing that would be on at least one news paper, smirking to himself thinking of all the times he'd wanted to do that and Draco hadn't let him, saying 'it isn't proper' to which he would always mumble about not giving a shit what was proper, which he knew pissed Draco off to know end. Well there you go Draco, up yours.

He arrived shortly at Ron's house, which was smaller than his own, but Harry loved it more than his, Ron had a home, Harry had a house. He knocked on the door apprehensively and it opened. Ron stood and looked at Harry; they hadn't spoken outside of functions and the ministry where they both worked in a long time. Before Harry could open his mouth to say sorry Ron opened his arms and embraced Harry like a brother and said "Welcome Home" Harry smiled a true smile and felt the tears spring in his eyes, releasing him Ron invited him in to his home closing the door quickly to shut out the cold.

**A.N. **Well, hope you like… review? Please?


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